Why Would I Write

Category: Thoughts

  • Why people don’t hold the poles in trains.

    So this post was supposed to be accompanied by a drawing of an old lady with sagging tits sandwiching the metal pole, but I couldn’t come up with anything as tasteful as circus granny (lol)

    Anyway, I just had a thought about why some people don’t hold onto the pole on the trains- maybe they’re afraid of the things the pole has come into contact with before. Then I started thinking about what could touch those poles, and instantly the idea of a grandma came to my head. I swear, I don’t know why. Haha

    How about the butt cheeks of some over sized person or just someone with dirty hands?

    Cleanest part of the LRT to hold on to? Probably the ceiling of the train. Though not everybody is tall enough to reach it comfortably.

    Okay this post was a pointless introduction to the promotion of my next performance:

    Doppelganger 23rd November 2008
    8.30-12am
    RM20 per entry (you get one drink)
    Marketplace KL

    Main acts:
    – Mei Chern
    – Markiza & Peter Hassan Brown
    – Benchmarx
    – Jasmine Low

    click here for the official flyer

    I’ll playing the open mic spot 😀 so come and watch!

  • Smart Phones

    So the other day I was thinking to myself. Hell, I’m always thinking to myself when I’m driving in the car and I’m stuck in a traffic jam.

    But anyways, the reason I was stuck in the jam was cos my touch n go card was out of credit. Normally I’d be cruising past tolls on the smart TAG lane.

    So I’ve thought to myself before- why doesn’t everyone invest in a smart TAG gadget? Yes it is pricey, but for the amount of money (from burning fuel when your car is idling in the jam) and time you save with it, it is worth every sen! Coming from a smart TAG user, you don’t know how many times I’ve said ‘boy am I glad I have smart TAG!’ the ridiculous amount of traffic you can beat is incredible. Think of it as a long term investment. No, this isn’t an advertorial. (LOL)

    Anyways, smart TAG wasn’t supposed to be the main topic of my post, the main point of my post was supposed to be this note I saved on my phone:

    “Phones should act as smart tags”.

    See, when you’re stuck in the jam, you think of all these strange things. I was thinking about how to solve the problem of traffic jams at tolls. And I came up with 2 answers- abolish all tolls (obviously unreasonable lol) or make smart TAG free. So everybody would be using it and there wouldn’t be anymore toll traffic. But then again, it would be hard to make all these lazy people get off their asses to collect their free gadgets, so why not make phones have the capabilities to act as smart TAGs?

    People would enable blue tooth or something on their phone, and when they drive by the toll, the fare would just be deducted from their credit or added to their phone bill! Haha, maybe it isn’t technically possible at this point in time, but I’m sure as technology develops, such an idea becomes viable.

    Minister of transportation? Fo sho! lol

  • Cabs of the future.

    So the other day I got in a cab, and realized that the cab in front of me was going to the same place as well. Then I thought to myself- wasn’t that a huge waste of petrol and money? If only I knew the person in front, we could have shared the cab, the costs, and the cab driver would’ve saved petrol, and hence saved the environment.

    But because we were strangers, we didn’t get on the same cab.

    So in the car I started thinking to myself about cabs in the future. Maybe in the future, there would be a sign on top of the cab that displays its destination, via which route, and how many more passengers it can carry. And people who were going to the same place can flag the cab down and join the ride. The meter would calculate when the second person got on and split the remainder of the distance with the new guy and so on.

    This would solve problems with not enough taxis going around, encourage carpooling, and who knows, even create relationships between strangers!

    Anybody wanna vote me into parliament for ministry of transport?
    Fuck me, I’m just babbling lol.