Why Would I Write

Category: Random

  • My Shell

    I’m not sure if it’s because of past experiences, but today I reminded myself of my hatred for being in extremely crowded places.

    I was walking around Chinatown today, and felt extremely uncomfortable being surrounded by so many people. There was a fear of being pick pocketed, being the victim of a random slashing incident and even being hit by a passing vehicle. It was mostly irrational, and I can’t really explain why I felt that way, but it was just what my mind was going through as I walked through the crowded streets.

    If it wasn’t a fear of something bad happening, there was the annoyance of having to slow down my walk when there were too many people standing in my way. I don’t know why people aren’t more considerate in public. Please don’t hog walkways. It’s like people standing on the walking side of escalators, and acting oblivious to people who would like to get to their destinations quicker. Is it so hard to a considerate human being?

    Maybe it was because of the weather. The stink of rubbish and sweaty people amplified by the scorching sun wasn’t helping alleviate my irrational thoughts.

    I like cities. But I hate crowds. I enjoy KL when everyone’s gone for the holidays. I stand at the back at gigs instead of participating in the mosh pit. I love being by myself. Am I turning into a hermit or a paranoid? Hmm.

  • Drinking Ain’t What It Used To Be

    Yesterday I was at a drinking party and I wasn’t the one making a fool of myself. It felt strange. Like I knew what it was like to be that guy and I was no longer him. Trying my best to appear sober, while downing more drinks than my body could handle. Talking out of line, loudly, and acting ridiculous.

    Younger George wouldn’t say no to that drink. At least that’s what I remembered. Younger George would never say no to any drink. After all, if it had alcohol, it was delicious and bound to be fun. I wonder if there’s a way to measure how many brain cells I’ve had destroyed by drinking past my limit.

    Then again, younger George has been through some shit. Fortunately for younger George, he had amazing friends who looked after his drunk ass when he went down. Honestly, those guys are all champs. Younger George didn’t deserve them, but they were there for him anyway.

    I remember during my initial days of clubbing – a group of us would have trouble even finishing one bottle of whiskey. Then we got more tolerant and could even do a single bottle between two people. Now I can’t drink that much anymore, also I believe I’m much better at controlling my intake. Because even though it was fun talking about the adventures of younger George, it only seems funny because I was being an idiot – and I came out of my incidents mostly unscathed.

    It took a serious car accident to make me realize how stupid I was but in reality, that didn’t need to happen.

    Anyway, I still enjoy some alcohol every now and then, but I can go for weeks without a drink. It’s not a necessity in my life. I’m equally happy having conversation over sips of hot coffee or tea, and a cigarette or vape in my other hand. There’s no need for the high of alcohol when you have the company of good friends around you. Younger George would have suggested afternoon drinks instead.

    “You’re a shadow of your former self! What happened to you?”

    It’s alright, I’m okay with having less ‘fun’ these days – at least my friends and family won’t have to worry about me every time I go out. Also, I won’t have to spend so long shitting out the previous night’s drinks in the toilet or wasting the day nursing a hangover. It’s a win-win situation. Farewell, younger George. It was nice knowing you.

  • Snus

    Snus

    Snus. I had no idea what a Snu was until a year or two ago I saw a photograph of a Dota 2 player using them. I was like, what the fuck was Snus? So I decided to look it up. On a side note, what do you call people who use Snus? Snusers (dad joke haha).

    Anyway, Snus fell off my radar for a while until a few weeks ago Seng Yip sent me a picture of Snus being sold at a counter. I was like, whoa! They sell Snus here. So yesterday, I had the opportunity to purchase Snus and got myself a tin. I already smoke and vape, I figured one more vice wouldn’t hurt.

    My first Snu was pretty awkward. I couldn’t hold it under my upper lip properly, it kept slipping out. It was then I realized that I could hold it to the side of my mouth instead. I felt proud of myself. Then I googled it and realized that it was what other people did too – it doesn’t matter where you put it in your mouth, just that the upper part of your mouth has less saliva, so you generate less spit with the sachet lodged in upper part of your mouth.

    I purchased the mint variation of General Snus and the experience honestly reminded me of chewing mint gum, minus the chewing action. I might try the regular version once I’m done with this tin. My throat also felt a little rough when I was swallowing my saliva, turns out – it’s the nicotine in the Snus that causes that.

    As for its effects, I guess it’s kinda effective at reducing your cigarette intake. Like today, I only smoked one cigarette at work – because I wanted to have one after lunch. There’s something about the action of exhaling smoke that isn’t covered by Snus (duh). However, during other times, I just popped one into my mouth and kept it there for about 45 minutes. I had two Snus at work. It seemed to solve my nicotine craving. Not that I’m using Snus to quit smoking, mind you. It just happened to work that way.

    While having Snus at my desk, I understood how convenient it was. I didn’t have to get out of my desk to get my fix of nicotine. My colleagues seated next to me were probably happy I didn’t smell like cigarettes the whole day. I can see them being really useful for long meetings and watching films in the cinema. Hopefully I don’t get too addicted to them because I’ve only seen them on sale at Publika and nowhere else. Would be a bitch if I couldn’t get a fix when I needed one.

    Oh George, you can you know, just stop smoking. I guess I could. Writing this post, I realized that I’ve succumbed to the power of indirect advertising. Funny huh?