Pet Brother.

A pet brother is a guy who gets himself stuck in the ‘friends zone’ after unsuccessfully hitting on a girl. Seeing as he has no more chance with her, he hangs on to the few last strands of hope and allows himself to be the next best thing (in his head)- a pet brother.

A ‘pet brother’ is above a ‘normal friend’ in terms of the friendship level. But there is a reason its called a ‘pet friendship’. Because while there might be genuine friendship going on, a pet will never be an equal with its master. Hence they are called pets. Being a pet brother to some girl doesn’t make her your pet sister- pets don’t have pets, pets have masters. In this case, mistresses.

A pet brother will tell his mistress that the guy she likes sucks. ‘Oh I’m so much better than him, what can he do that I can’t? You shouldn’t get together with him!’ and subtly hint to her that he should be the one.

He’ll get excited whenever they go out- to the girl it’s just some normal outing with a friend (pet) but to him, it’ll be the most magical evening they’ll ever spend, each one better than the last. Because in his mind its a date, but the truth is nobody else was free enough chauffeur her out that evening.

Oh yes, he’ll come all the way from the other side of town to pick her up. In his car will be a CD that he burnt- full of songs she loves (that he’s forced himself to love as well). He’ll memorize some lyrics so that they can sing along together. Just because.

He drives an automatic, but he still leaves his hand on the gear stick. He conveniently leaves his hand there. Because he’s secretly hoping. Just hoping, that she will place her hand over his, and grip his hand tightly while he drives. But he keeps it all inside, because he knows that if he says anything more, it would ruin this special ‘friendship’ they share.

All this while, the girl probably notices what’s going on (I heard that girls are pretty perceptive about these things) but she acts nonchalantly about it, because she doesn’t want to ruin this ‘mastery’ that she has over her pet. She’s already got someone else or someone else on her mind. And it is not him. But pet brother has a car and is willing to drive great distances and so she likes keeping him around.

Pet brothers realize this maybe a few years later, and kick themselves for being such tools. Sometimes they’ve become so domesticated, they can’t survive out in the wild, so they continue being pets (sometimes to other mistresses). Sometimes they learn, and move on. Even mastering techniques to make themselves masters, and girls their pets.

Being let go is a better fate than staying a pet for life. Most of the time, it’s worth taking the risk to reveal to your mistress your true intentions.