Stories

A series of unfortunate events.

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Today was a pretty eventful day.

I took my car for servicing in the morning. Some of my speakers are busted.

I had to go to work (not for the whole day, but still!).

My atm card got stuck in the machine– and came out a few minutes later. (I panicked for a moment)

A friend of mine had his house ransacked. But the robbers were pretty stupid– they left 2 laptops, an iPod and a ps3 alone, while rummaging through the whole house and only taking some alcohol.

I heard another story from another friend: his uncle gave a robber a cash check. The robber tried to cash it in at a bank..and he got arrested on the spot. LOL

I watched Beowulf in the cinema and it was probably one of the worst movie experiences I’ve ever had. Some asshole sat next to me and throughout the whole show he kept talking out loud! To his friend! Who was seated a some couple of seats away! Behind him! Whenever some titties came on screen or something exciting happened, he would go ape shit and mutter some unintelligible sentences. I wonder what would happen if he ever saw a real girl naked in front of him. He would probably die or something. And he wasn’t even sitting in the right seat! And to top it off- he was one smelly fucker. People like him don’t deserve to watch movies in cinemas. In fact, they don’t even deserve to watch movies.

One more person to add to the list of people I hate.

But Beowulf was a pretty good movie. The graphics were amazing (though some parts reminded me of Shrek), and storyline just passable. But it could have done with more action sequences. But it was an enjoyable movie. Some parts were censored in the cinema though. Gotta get the dvd version to see what was cut out.

On the way home I encountered another bunch of mat rempits. Doing ‘superman’ and weaving in and out of traffic.

Its been awhile since I’ve had any awesome dreams. Work is stressful like a motherfucker. It’s still the same, it hasn’t changed, but I don’t know why it’s gotten harder. And is it so hard to learn from mistakes? Fuck! I thought humans learn that fire is hot by touching it. They never make the same mistake again. Maybe I should bring a fucking torch to work and burn some fingers each time someone sends me a half-assed done scene.

Sunday afternoon home

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Clearing out my phone’s saved messages again- here we go!

So the other day I drove next to this guy in a black 1990 Celica

and parked next to him. It was a coincidence really, our cars happened to be the same color as well. Only thing he had was a larger muffler. Anyways, when I got out of the car, he gave me this stare like I was trying to steal his girlfriend or something (which was right beside him in his car). So I ran over to his window, punched through it and shards of glass went into his eyes. Just kidding about the punching part. I just ignored it and walked off. But yeah, it wasn’t like I did anything! I didn’t even notice his girlfriend at first. It was dark at night. But anyways, thanks for the cold stare asshole!

Drinking soft drinks for rings for dialysis machines

Recently I’ve been collecting can drink rings for a friend who wants them to make a wheel chair (she promised me I could ride in it when it was completed lol). I remembered a few years back, another friend of mine wanted the rings for making a dialysis machine as well. I’m like how many things can you make with these things? Next thing I know we’re gonna have an airplane made from can rings. Then I started thinking about what I was doing- I was drinking unhealthy drinks for a health-related purpose. I thought that was ironic. Maybe next time I’m really gonna need the wheelchair when my legs freeze up from having too much sugar, or I’ll need the dialysis machine cos I put salt in all my drinks (no I don’t do that).

Don’t change your toothbrush every 3 months, brush twice a day, don’t use mouthwash, don’t go to the dentist, you’ll have great teeth like me, never be afraid to smile anymore

And I have to add ‘no flossing either’ to the list. The other day I was talking with Raelene about teeth, and I mentioned how I never took good care of them, but they still remain some of the best looking teeth around (haha..I kid). I’ve had numerous comments about how white my teeth are, or how straight they are blablabla and so on, but I never went beyond the duty of just brushing them twice a day. I never floss, only went to the dentist when my teeth hurt (so far I’ve only been to the dentist 3-4 times my whole life), never changed my toothbrush every 3 months- I mean come on! they start to get comfortable after 2 months! I hate the feeling of brand new bristles over my teeth..its so.. bad?? It’s indescribable. Haha. A few days after that conversation I had a toothache. I’m supposed to go to the dentist to check it out, but I have yet to :p It’s gone now, and hopefully it won’t resurface.

Traffic reports don’t save time, they tell you what you already know! What if you had to go kl and it’s jammed all over?

Traffic reports are useless. Period. They do not save you time! They give you reports in real time. They tell you what is already happening. The other day I was stuck in KL and the report came on. ‘Traffic is congested all over KL’ Yeah, tell me something I don’t already know! I mean, what if the place you’re going to only has one way to reach it? When you live here, you learn to live with the jam anyway. It’s part of life, unless of course you fly a helicopter. Traffic reports are redundant. They don’t help you beat the jam! They make you wish you were at home instead of stuck in the fucking car traffic. ‘Oooh there’s an accident on the federal, motorists are advised not to stop and look’. Half the fucking country doesn’t seem to act that way!

Just saw a cop pull over a dude for using the emergency lane – to overtake a cop car! Hahaha funny shit

This was one of the funniest things I saw in the morning. It was a huge traffic jam to work. They closed 4 lanes into 1 lane (some construction work going on along the batu caves/gombak highway, I don’t know what its called. MRR2 as well? Anyways, I was on the slow lane, and I saw a police car use the emergency lane to cut through the traffic and cut in the car in front of me. About a minute later, another car came, on the same emergency lane as well, and cut in front of the cop car!! I LOLed to myself in the car when that happen. The next thing you know, the police car turned on its siren lights and pulled the dude over. ‘Thanks for our morning kopi!’

Chicken Rice Balls (and more stories from my handphone)

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So I haven’t posted in awhile. I haven’t been too free. But all that has changed! Muawahahahaha

I spent last Thursday, Friday, and Saturday at the office working my ass off (with my colleagues) to meet a deadline (we didn’t make it anyway lol). Reminded me of my final semester at Lim Kok Wing, where I wouldn’t sleep and just work all day and night. Eating like one meal a day, just working, working working..

Anyways..on to clearing out the saved messages on my handphone:

I don’t see what’s the point of chicken rice balls- they taste the same as normal chicken rice. You just have a harder time eating it. Someone decided they could make money by making balls out of rice and selling them at higher prices. Well I guess it worked!

Written when I was on a trip to Melaka awhile back..chicken rice balls FTL!

Cars should have a ‘go ahead’ light! You sometimes you encounter situations when you’re moving slowly and another car slows down for you, you don’t get it, but when you do and speed up, the other car speeds up and you can’t go anymore.. Sometimes they flash their lights, but you never know what they mean! Go? or don’t go!

Written when I was annoyed with cars.

Villains aren’t so cool anymore. I saw a snatch thief victim. Blood all on his hands. I felt pity for him.

Now I understand why people never glorify real villains.

My mom doesn’t like going back home before completing everything, its a waste of time i guess it rubbed off on me

A load of gibberish, but it basically means that nowadays, I don’t like going out of the house, coming back home and then going out again. If I’m going out, I want to get everything done before returning home. Something my mom does all the time. Last time whenever I came back home and went out again, she would scold me, ‘wah you think petrol so cheap ah?!’ so I guess I slowly conformed.

A mars a day helps you work, rest and play

I read if on the Mars chocolate bar wrapper.

Everytime someone jumps a red light, I like to shake my head in hopes that they would see me and feel guilty

Doesn’t everybody do that? They go ‘tsk tsk’ inside the car, when clearly the other person 10 meters away, behind at least 2 layers of glass can hear them. The things people do.

My cousin is twelve and I wear smaller shirts than him

Something is obviously wrong here.

Bringing sprouts to a cashier, express counter denies entry.

I always wondered if one day what if a cashier decides to play a prank and deny to serve a customer who brought a bag of sprouts to the express counter. ‘less than 10 items sir! that looks like a 100 beans!’

And to conclude, I shall leave you guys with a taste of an upcoming project :p
Click here
I’m not saying what it is.. yet 🙂